Posts Tagged ‘anime’


Weeaboo Wednesday: the Haruhi Dance!!!

November 11, 2009


I know it’s been literally an entire semester since I’ve posted a Weeaboo Wednesday, but look, I actually don’t know that much about Japan. I guess I could have kept reviewing weird hentai that I “accidentally” came upon, but I am pretty tired of getting hits from search terms like “world of warcraft tentacle” and “kkids fucking”.



Weeaboo Wednesday: Why It Might Be Okay to Watch Bleach

July 29, 2009


My life can loosely be described as a big fat sausagefest. For one thing, I work for the Heuristic Squelch. Comedy, like most things that aren’t jazz music, is dominated by white men, and the Squelch is no exception. Our female membership has increased by roughly 400% since my arrival– and yet the magazine is still dominated by a ponderously large amount of dick jokes.

For another thing, I’m a philosophy major. The percentage of female undergraduates in philosophy– nationwide– is something like 30%. For a little bit of perspective— the percentage of female undergraduates in the humanities (nationwide) is something like 60%. The gender ratio in philosophy is comparable to the ratio in computer science.

Combine that with my decidedly neckbeardesque taste in music and my dismal, crippled relationship with my cold, cold mother, and what you get is a very good reason to never read shounen.

Look at this way: after a long day of sparring with moleskine-wielding, unshaven, fixed-gear riding douchebags over Kant’s transcendental idealism, would you rather read a childish comic about an awkward and blush-filled courtship with a high school tennis star, or a childish comic about an awkward and yell-y duel-to-the-death that determines whose magic dragon ninja ghost sword is the biggest?

miageta yozora no hoshitachi no hikari

miageta yozora no hoshitachi no hikari

Click here to see whose magic dragon ninja ghost sword is the biggest!


Weeaboo Wednesday: NANA

July 15, 2009


This column was written on July 8th and initially published that day. Upon hitting the “Publish” button, I saw that Kyle had already written one. Because it was Kyle’s week to write a WW, and I had forgotten. So I took it off the site and decided to publish it the next week. Except that would have been yesterday, and yesterday I forgot. Fortunately there’s this thing where you can fiddle with the date that an entry appears to be filed under. This column was retro-published on the site on Thursday the 16th. Look, it’s not like these are particularly time-sensitive, OKAY?

So apparently Ai Yazawa, creator of some of my all-time favorite shoujo manga, is very sick and won’t be updating Nana for a while. Given this tragic and unverifiable news I sort of remember reading on, I thought it might be a good opportunity to put Ai Yazawa on trial for bringing out the worst in the Japanese– and in doing so, introduce you gaijin to the absolutely fascinating, somewhat nauseating phenomenon that is Nana.

sexy whittled-down clothespin figure

Japan gets even weirder after the jump


Weeaboo Wednesday: What Your Anime Says About You

June 24, 2009


Sarah’s fascinating post last week inspired me to further investigate the nuances of other media from the glorious East. This time, however, I’ll be investigating the more personal connection that lays between anime and its consumers. More specifically, what we can learn about a person’s personality from what kind of anime they enjoy. While some of you might immediately dismiss this idea as silly, cliche, and more suitable for a MySpace quiz, I can’t help but remind you that it’s totally tsundere of you to point that out (and if you get that without clicking the link, you simply cannot judge me). Now then, without further ado let’s move on to the main attraction:

Read the rest of this entry ?


Weeaboo Wednesday: Lust Train, Pt. 3 – the Finale

June 3, 2009


During the last section of Philosophy 12A (Introduction to Logic), my GSI wrapped up his explanation of the deduction as he usually did– meeting the blank stares and tortured sighs of a classroom full of clueless freshmen and lazy seniors with a skillful but unsuccessful attempt to draw out anything like interest, or even a useful question. With a good twenty minutes left in the hour, he simply gave up and opened the floor to questions– any questions of any sort. Hands immediately shot up. “Does this deduction system carry over anywhere else?” “Where does this come into play in philosophy?” “Would we find this kind of abstract logic outside of the university?” One after another, students asked several variations on what was pretty much the same question:

“Why did I take this class again?”

The Squelch has a word for this curious admixture of exhaustion and bewilderment: Magician Basketball. In the immortal words of our old editor-in-chief, who at the time was finishing up his PEIS senior thesis on the fascinating topic of third world agriculture:

(pauses, looks around at circle of gathered players, sighs) Man, why did I ever decide to coach magician basketball?

We all get moments like that. Some of us feel it because we just spent an entire week of all-nighters writing about some Brazilians you’ve never met, whose language you don’t speak, and whose struggle is growing ever less important than your physical and mental health; others because we just stumbled through an entire semester of incomprehensibly abstract symbology that isn’t necessary (and certainly not sufficient) to understand even someone as obscure as Saul Kripke. And then sometimes you find yourself writing the third part of a series of columns on a really weird hentai video you discovered. We’ve all been there.

This last post contains the shortest temporal part of the video, but by far covers the most material. But as exhausted as I am, I find it difficult to provide a commentary… in any case, Lust Train speaks for itself.

NSFW screencaps past the fold


Weeaboo Wednesday: Lust Train, Pt. 2

May 20, 2009


It was with great hesitation and mild dismay that I logged out of a satisfying session of World of Warcraft in order to bring you more horrible, horrible porn. Although I was initially very excited about the potential comedy value of “Lust Train,” going as far as to describe it as the “best thing ever,” two or three or twelve repeat viewings have definitely dimmed my enthusiasm. Although the combination of hilariously wrong, morally reprehensible hentai and transforming gundam robots is pretty excellent, watching huge boobs getting lashed together by slender tentacles and then milked like udders is kind of a downer if you subscribe to anything remotely resembling feminist principles. But I promised to bring you more– so here I am.

If you haven’t read the first part of my write-up yet, you are a) one of the few readers who didn’t stumble onto this site while looking up “skunk fu hentai,” b) probably better off for it.


If this image loaded on your computer, the FBI is already on their way.

This week’s post is going to go straight into the mind-bogglingly unerotic. Just to make it entirely clear: this post is NOT WORK SAFE, it’s not even mind safe. THIS IS REALLY A REVIEW OF HENTAI. Brace yourselves for a truly terrifying journey…

Please, no angry e-mails about how the following screen caps rendered you incapable of ever enjoying sex again.


Wikipedia: Panchira

May 11, 2009

The following excerpt, to me, sums up the whole of wikipedia– it comes from the article on “Panchira,” which is apparently just Japanese for “pantyshot” or “upskirt”. You know, those borderline child pornography bits in otherwise PG anime? Yeah, those. So why was I looking up the wikipedia article for panchira in the first place? I followed a link from the article on one of my more recent discoveries, Princess Resurrection. Yeah, when I’m not busy drinking, or busy being advised by medical professionals to stop drinking, I read a lot of really bad manga. Anyways, there’s a section of the article devoted to instances of indirect panchira– panchira that occurs off camera. [I don’t know how the hell that counts as panchira.] One of the entries reads:

  • In an episode of the anime Trigun, a female hostage shoots her captor with a weapon held between her feet, since her hands are tied. The captor’s last words are “They were white.”

This. is. wikipedia.