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Weeaboo Wednesday: A Wonderland Called Japan

May 27, 2009

weeaboo

In my travels across the internet, I have seen wonders and heard tales of a land across the sea called Japan. There, one can seek the company of a loli without some prick from NBC spoiling your fun, read manga all day without your step-dad telling you to man up and wash your face, and even spend hours laughing at a TV show that has no premise beyond a ‘monkey and a dog are friends.’ Japan is almost too glorious a place to describe in one post so today I will take you into the home of a Japanese person, and show you a small sample of the wonderland called Japan.

All Japanese people live in homes like these

All Japanese people live in homes like these

You would be amiss to assume this house’s old-timey hidden ninja village look carries through into the interior. In fact, this house holds technological wonders that we won’t see for another 15 years. The items inside this home are a testament to the efficiency and industry Japan. Since the Japanese are a trustworthy people, doors are rarely locked, lets look inside!

As we look around, one really gets a sense of how advanced the Japanese truly are. Just look at this:

Putting dog poop back into a dog-shaped trash can? Visionary.

Putting dog poop back into a dog-shaped trash can? Visionary.

In case you haven’t yet mastered Japanese as I have, the ad above is for a trashcan that recycles pet poop. Technology like this in every home could greatly reduce the presence of pet waste, which contributes to destructive phenomenon like red tides. Shaping it like a dog creates a sense of irony—a literary device that Japan has had severe shortages of since the Meiji Restoration in 1868.

Moving away from the dog-shaped poop dispenser, one might find one of these frightening things skittering across the floor:

Dont be alarmed, it is a Japanese baby

Don't be alarmed, it is a Japanese baby

What we have here is an example of the Japanese nuclear family structure at work. Confucian philosophy dictates that one show deference to their elders. Thus, more menial tasks fall to the younger generation. Here, we see one such industrious whipper-snapper hard at work. This might seem strange to individualistic Americans, but this product is just a way for the child to do its part around the house. Think of it as a mop that has to be led around with a stuffed animal.

As the baby-broom crawls toward a distant distraction, we find ourselves with a moment to peruse the closets of our gracious hosts. Let’s see what interesting trinkets await us there.

Truly, Japan is a standard by which other cultures will be judged when history looks back on us

Truly, Japan is a standard by which other cultures will be judged when history looks back on us

This is a bust roller. I’m not sure what it does exactly, but I’m sure we will have them in America in a few years.

Perhaps we should leave our hosts in peace for now, they might return from their busy day’s work at any moment! Though the Japanese are known for being kind hosts, entering an empty home in the middle of the day without an invitation is a cultural taboo. I hope you enjoyed this small sample of the wonderland called Japan!

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